my goal

this was me and this is where i wanna be.

i wish i could go back in time and tell myself that this is happiness to me. i wish i could tell myself that i was all i needed and that i had done this for my self.

i wish i could have told myself that it was not okay to eat, and that eating did not mean that i was happy. i never hated my body, i hated everyone who was too blind to appreciate me! the people who never saw past my smile to see the broken little girl who was slowly slipping. and the one person who did open their arms to me and never accepted because i just didnt know how to.

this time i wont get there because i want a boy who i wasnt good enough for, not because i was too sad to eat and not because of depression.

i will get there for me.